Male Movie Characters Women Would Love to Date (And Men Could Learn From)

Straight outta PourHabit’s headquarters, courtesy of our editor Shirley P:

Over the years, Hollywood has helped shape (and I admit, distort) the female mind about the ideal guy. There was always the Disney guy to begin with. I would admit some of them are way too fancy and too perfect for the regular dude to achieve. But still, to give due credit to Hollywood, there are some male characters in movies that are quite the stunner and the charmer or at least possess some character traits that every men could learn from.

Here’s PourHabit’s list of male movie characters that women would love to date, and men could learn from:

  • Noah Calhoun (Ryan Gosling/The Notebook)

Ahh but of course! Who wouldn’t fall in love with the young Ryan Gosling? And who wouldn’t fall in love with the young man who pursued the woman he loved despite their social statuses being worlds apart?

Fall-in-Love Factor: We girls have this thing for impossible love affairs, a la Romeo and Juliet, and absolutely love men who are willing to fight for that love no matter what. Aww Noah!

  • Henry Roth (Adam Sandler/50 First Dates)

If the woman you are dating forgets about you after 24 hours, would you throw in the towel or would you do as Henry did to ‘Forgetful Lucy’?

Fall-in-Love-Factor: All that effort of making her fall in love with him over and over and over again – on a daily basis – is enough to make us girls love him. Oh it helped that he has such a sense of humor. Who wouldn’t love a funny guy anyway? Now gents, you don’t have to be all grand in gesture; the smallest effort goes a long, long way. Trust me.

  • Jack Dawson (Leonardo di Caprio/Titanic)

No male-loving creature resisted falling in love with Leonardo di Caprio’s big screen break as Jack Dawson in Titanic. Admit it: he was one of the reasons why it is still the top grossing Hollywood film of all time (apart from you, men, enjoying Kate Winslet’s nakedness and that steamy love scene). Jack was carefree, young, happy, and very romantic and would do everything for love. Oh and it helped how wonderfully he transformed from regular guy to jaw dropper when he donned that tux. I’m not surprised Rose fell in love with doe-eyed Jack too soon. Seriously, I fell for him in the first minute of the movie, and I was 8 at the time. Can’t blame Rose, can I?

Fall-in-Love Factor: Jack’s incredibly contagious happiness and carefree attitude won girls over. He was also bouncing with so much life it was hard not to smile and have fun with him around. Give that girl the same energy and she’ll love your company.

  • Jacob Palmer (Ryan Gosling – again, I know/Crazy, Stupid Love)

Except for being a total womanizer (and a true master of seduction techniques), Jacob was the definition of the classy man. He carried himself well, he was as confident as he looks, and he knows how to dress up and talk to ladies.

Fall-in-Love Factor: Men who are confident are always sexy. Turn off, though, if you bedded different women every night.

  • Will Shakespeare (Joseph Fiennes, Shakespeare in Love)

By now you know I really have a thing for against-all-odds type of romance. But seriously, how can you resist the young William Shakespeare if he’s written sonnet after sonnet after sonnet in your honor? And he went as far as dressing up like your chambermaid and climbed your walls just to see you?

Fall-in-Love Factor: Poetry, like chivalry, is never dead. And all that effort, again, will win girls over.

The other men who made my list included James Bond (define ‘debonair’ and you get Bond, James Bond), Cal Weaver (Steve Carrell, Crazy Stupid Love), and Zorro (Antonio Banderas, The Mask of Zorro). How about you guys? Who’s your role model male movie character (you know, those who seem to master the art of picking up girls with ease) and why?

Out,

Shirley P. (Standing in for Sebastian M.) @ PourHabit

5 Signs She’s Waiting for a Proposal

conventional-marriage-proposalWe’ve seen it in movies. Soaps and TV series have used it in their material countless times. Even TV ads trying to be funny have had their share of it. Yes, we’ve all seen a woman get her heart broken when she thought her man was going to propose and he didn’t. Emma Stone and Jen Aniston might have made it look funny and some stuff for a romcom with a happily ever after plot twist in the end but boy, oh, boy, it ain’t as good as that if it happens in real life. And it’s not even about the perfect hair and the lack of it!

For one, dahlings, it’s utterly embarrassing. You know how it is when you’ve got your expectations a little too high only to find out there was nothing to hope for? It’s like finding out Santa is not real, or opening your cereal box hoping for a toy only to find nothing. Nada. That’s one of the biggest heartbreaks in the history of human existence. I know attracting women through eye contact really works with you!

And if this happens to you and your girl, you can’t just totally blame her for expecting. You either have had your part in it, making hints and sending the wrong message, or you may have been missing the signs that yes, she is and has long been ready for you to get down on one knee and offer marriage.

Signs She’s Waiting for your Wedding Proposal

Gentlemen you should see this, whether you’re trying to test the waters and see if it’s an opportune time to propose the big ‘I Do’ to her without fear of getting rejected, or you fear that she’s waiting and expecting when you’re not ready just because of your misleading actions, here’s a little something for you: 5 signs that she’s waiting for your proposal.

  1. She hints at weddings, proposals, gowns, etc. Girls are not the best types of beings around when it comes to saying thing straight to the point. We are wired to be subtle, send hints, to make a good use of our extra-verbal cues to send a message across. If she starts talking about wedding gowns a little too often, or gossips too much about who got hitched and who eloped and who proposed, she may be thinking along those lines too hoping you’d get the message.
  2. She talks about settling down a little too often. The topic that you just used to shrug under the rug is now out in the open. It’s a topic that she brings up more often and more openly than usual, although it’s on the perimeters of ‘what if’s’ and general, random questions and statements.
  3. She makes a big move that leans towards benefiting you and the relationship more than her. She gives up a high paying job for a simpler, lower-paying one to be closer to you, she suggests moving in together, she spends more time learning how to cook, or just basically spending less time on her personal and career advancement and leans towards adjusting her life to suit you both better.
  4. She takes extra trips to the jewelry store to ‘look around’. A classic move, if you ask me. Just like the last time she got you to buy her shoes for her birthday just by passing by them every single time you go to the mall, she is subconsciously doing the same with the engagement ring.
  5. She talks about how well accepted you are in her family and/or circle of friends. She randomly brings up the fact that your Daddy got an extra person in his golf club membership for you; or that Grandma Olga is making her pies a little less sweet because she knows you’re health conscious; or that your brothers are always in awe of your card tricks and how they love having you around on holidays. This is her way of telling you ‘hey, it’s okay! You have everyone’s approval’ and that nothing should stop you from actually proposing if you are thinking of it.

SOooo, is she waiting or is she waiting for your proposal?

How Not to Fall for a Player

a70e0c672b09deacfd01f93ea675dc06Female players were practically unheard of in your parents’ or grandparents’ younger years. And even today, females who love juggling different men at the same time for her entertainment aren’t an idea that’s pretty easy to grasp. After all, to many of us, women are still seen as the more conservative of the sexes – feminism and all. But how to be alpha – a guide for every red-blooded (straight) male?

But I kid you not, gentlemen, there are women who are as good as men in playing and breaking hearts. Yes, there are female players. And just as much as women should be wary and cautious about falling for players’ antics, so should you. Your masculinity could have no match for the heartbreak that these women can bring!

Tips on how NOT to fall for a player

Here are some tips on how NOT to fall for a player should you be confronted with such a woman:

  • Don’t make it your life goal to change her. A player changes at her own pace, at her own time, and when she finally realizes the need to. No amount of coaxing from one person could change her mind and her ways in dating so don’t put your heart out into that goal. You’d only break your heart and waste your time on something futile.
  • Don’t make her your best friend. These women are masters of disguise, con artists, and are seduction goddesses. They know their way around men and how to make men fall for them and to go out there to be her ‘best friend’ is a suicide of the heart. You’re buying your ticket to Heartbreak Hotel, mister.
  • Remind yourself that no matter how great her qualities are, she’s a player. A lot of us have this thing about seeing the good in people; and while this is noble and only rightful to do, it may be best to change it a little when it comes to dealing with players. Know and see the goodness in her but always remind yourself that she’s a player. She can be a great colleague, a good neighbor, or a nice friend but remind yourself that one thing: she is a player who can break your heart. She is nice, sweet, funny, pretty, and smart BUT she’s a player. I’m not saying you should judge her entirely as a person for that one flaw, but to avoid falling for her, you have to always, ALWAYS, see that side of her. Don’t Flirt at Christmas Party!
  • Don’t try to justify her ways. She’s a player by choice, not by consequence. No amount of pain or anger should ever make a valid license for anyone to hurt others intentionally. So no matter how nice and good she is, or how badly she was hurt by some other man, her being a player can never be fully justified. The moment you create an excuse for her ‘bad’ behavior is also the moment you become the turtle who lay on its back on purpose. You are opening up yourself to the pain that she could cause you for seeing the ‘humanity’ and fragility of her little evil deeds.

Remember, stay away from the player! Guard your heart from heartbreaks!

How to Flirt at Christmas Parties

869510_39973649Everybody loves Christmas parties. Christmas parties, especially at work, give you the chance to booze up with your boss and exchange bad jokes with him and know that you won’t get into trouble for it the next day. Perhaps the only thing “bad” about these types of parties is that there’s so much food and so much booze all for the taking is the fact that you may not fit into any of your pants after the New Year’s. But hey, who’s to miss a night of fun and tons of flirting – yep, you read it right: flirting!

So, are you ready for that part of the party? If not, here are some really helpful tips that would help you bring your A-game into the Yuletide party scene to make it truly, truly merry!

How to flirt at Christmas parties

  • Look your absolute best. Sure you are the best dressed dude in your regular workday suit, but that does not mean you can just show up wearing the regular stuff you wear to work! This is a party and you should definitely look the part – that is, if you want to successfully meet and flirt with women all night long. Get your outfit ideas from your Hollywood style inspirations for that timely change of look! (PS: should I still really reiterate on the part of having to smell as good as you look? Hope not). This will definitely turn on a woman and has no reasons to cheat!
  • Don’t forget to curtsy to the bosses. Any woman who sees that you pay your courtesy duties to the people who threw the party will find you attractively respectful. That’s always a nod for you. And the only thing that could make this better is an appropriate party gift. Additional booze won’t hurt, but some awesome dessert (bought, made by mom, or by yourself) to add to the potluck table would impress any woman. That’s one really thoughtful and respectful guy right there!
  • Don’t get drunk. Getting drunk at these parties will: (a) make you miss out on a lot of things, (b) risk you becoming the laughingstock of the entire office – something that they will remember all the way to next year’s Christmas party (if you still have a job after the party), and (c) will make women avoid you – geez, no woman, or at least no sane woman wants to flirt with a drunk guy! So stay sober and be fun!
  • Just like any party, flirting would start with an offer of a drink. But to make things a little different, try out something else and offer her a dessert or a trip to the chocolate fountain. Now that’s smooth and sweet.
  • Keep your conversations sharp, witty, and fun. Hey, this is no time to talk about the Latin American economic movement! This is a time to let it loose and talk about the happy little things that make Christmas merry. Oh, and don’t forget to jest in some compliments and some slightly naughty stuff – but do know that you should keep it clean. Keep. It. Clean.
  • Don’t be such a wussie when it comes to doing the fun stuff they offer at the party. Dance Revo? Karaoke? Dating Game? Go ahead and give them a try! The fact that you’ve kept your sobriety is equivalent to you keeping your dignity while at it so good luck! And have a very, merry Christmas!

You might found a friend that will turn into Friends with benefits – some rules to observe.

5 Reasons Why Women Cheat

1078515_96443215Yes, we women have all heard about men cheating. We’ve also heard and seen on TV about the reasons why men cheat, what we ladies do that push even the most loyal of men to cheat, and what we can do to help stop our boyfriends from ever committing this horrible thing right before they even think about doing it.

It could be like this, how to start a conversation with a girl and keep it going.

But have you ever come to realize why women cheat? Do people – men, especially – even talk about women cheating at all? DO men even fawn over how to cheat-proof their relationships the way women fuzz about it?

Reasons Why Women Cheat

Well, if you haven’t, then I seriously hope this has gotten you guys into thinking: there are real women who are cheating out there and there are real reasons behind it; some of it are your doing, and some aren’t. But setting that thought aside, it is important for you to know what drives women into straying from their men for no reason but to simply help you avoid them.

Here they are:

  1. Money. They either hookup with someone who’s richer than them just to save them from their financial misery (or at least someone who can finance their luxurious desires in life as in gold diggers), or they just simply want to leave their broke boyfriends to find someone who isn’t exactly rich but at least is stable. It’s human nature – women go for men who can offer them security and financial stability is one of the essential factors of security in a relationship. So don’t wonder if your girlfriend suddenly leaves you if you’ve been a bum all of your life; she needs someone whom she can build a family with after all.1431754_95280085
  2. Sex. Yes, surprisingly boys, women do it for that reason too. But more often than not, as Hollywood films have surprisingly caught on their cameras, women who cheat for sex are women who are not naturally lustful; they are just dissatisfied with how their sexual lives are with their partners. So take a hint from her about how she truly feels about your sex life before she gives out a hint to someone else. Be sexy now!
  3. Lack of emotional stability in the current relationship. Women like being supported emotionally. No, wait – women need it. Women, no matter how independent they are, far more easily and more deeply get into the ‘couple’ mindset where they share everything with their partners and they naturally seek that emotional support from their men. If they can’t have that, they’d find the person who could give it to them, who can make them forget about their doubts about themselves and the relationship.
  4. Routine. Long term relationships are most vulnerable to this. Some women get bored and feel like their relationships have been the same for as long as they can remember. And then they feel the urge to have something new and well, someone new, just to break the routine and take them out of boredom if only for a few, discreet moments every now and then.
  5. Lack of appreciation. Humans – gender aside – have that innate need for appreciation. They need to know that their families, friends, loved ones appreciate what they are doing. And if a woman cannot feel that from her partner, chances are, she’s going to look for it from someone else. That, or easily fall prey to someone who gives her that.

Dress Sexy for Your Lady!

openrelationshipGuys, here’s some newsflash for you: you need to make an effort of looking sexy for your ladies too! Just the same way as women have to put a lot of effort in looking good in those skin-tight, barely-there lingerie, you have to give her something to drool about too in the bedroom.

It’s not enough that you just simply undress and do the deed. Women need to get excited too! Women need to be enticed, to be pleased with what they see to love what you’re planning to do; or at least, to love the preparations.

After learning how to ask a girl for her number, here are some more tips for you!

Why You Should Dress Sexy for your Woman

Dressing sexy for your lady will give you more benefits than you can imagine – benefits that are enough to compensate for the initial awkwardness of having to wear less than comfortable outfit. Here’s some for starters:

  • She will love you for it. I could not insist more about this: women love effort. And if she truly loves you, she will see the change and the amount of effort you’ve put into looking sexy for her. You’re likely to be handsomely rewarded! This will surely make her happy!
  • She will get her kinky mood on. If she needs a little spicing up in the bedroom, you in a sexy outfit will definitely kickstart her kinky!
  • It will make your sex life more exciting. She’s kinkier, you’re kinkier, and there’s something to look forward to in making love, what can be more exciting a sex life than that?

Now, I know that even when you’re convinced as to why you should invest in sexy outfits, the bigger question is this: how. And I’ve got that covered with this list of helpful tips:

  • If crotchless briefs, nut pouches, and male G-strings are a little too eccentric or too pornstar-esque for your taste, start with something simple and not too far out of your comfort zone. You can always start with tanga-esque cut of briefs, mini-boxers (these are really sexy), or leather briefs. They are just as sexy but not as ‘revealing’.
  • Use costumes. Every couple can use a little role-play or two. How about a tux-designed brief? Or wear your tie without the shirt, and only your black boxers to pair with for a little kinky glam night in the bedroom? You can also be the semi-naked cop, with only a costume cap, boots, and your good old sexy black bikini-cut briefs to complete the look. Be creative – trust me, it will take you thus far!
  • Go for wild colors and prints of underwear! Who says only Tarzan can wear animal prints for undies? Get her wild and crazy with some leopards, tigers, and zebras on your undies! Pair it with some three days worth of scruff, some wild attitude, and be ready to attack and pounce on her!

See this interesting article also :)

But of course, the lousiest of attitudes can ruin the best of intentions and efforts. The only way to deliver this perfectly is to pair it with tons and tons of sexy attitude!

Men’s Most Annoying Gestures Towards Women

sorry

Sometimes, even words fail us. Even the most eloquent of the male species comes to the point of losing speech for many reasons. And in these moments, when our power of speech just cannot suffice, we rely on extra-verbal communication and gestures to get our message across.

And this is especially true when trying to attract women. Men think that going directly to the woman and starting a conversation is too much and too soon that they use certain hand and body gestures to get the woman’s attention and/or to send a subtle message of interest to the woman. But because of bad role models, or mere bad intentions, the attempt at subtle flirting fails.

Gestures that will annoy women

Men often think of these gestures as flirty or complementary. Surprisingly, though, in the wrong context or timing and intention fact most women dislike or even hate it when guys do them. These 5 gestures are just examples, as there are surely other gestures like these that will annoy women:

  1. Winking. Winking would have been acceptable if this were the 70s or the 80s. But we’re almost halfway through the second decade of the 2000s and a random guy winking at a lady is definitely not a turn on. In this day and age, you can only consider winking when it’s an emoticon. Otherwise, it is just creepy. VERY CREEPY!
  2. Whistling. The only excuses I can think of that make whistling okay is when (a) you’ve magically mutated into a human-bird, (b) you’re a DOM (dirty old man), and (c) you’re a maniac. Unless you’re any of the three, whistling to a woman is an absolute no-no.  So, what’s your excuse this time?
  3. Staring at her from head to foot. Okay, so sometimes you are so attracted to women that you just cannot help but show it. But geez man, there are other, more respectful, less sex-offender-ish ways to show your appreciation for what you see. And staring at her from head to foot is definitely not one of them. It sends a very bad message; you are either (a) taking off her clothes in your mind, or (b) looking her down in an underestimating manner.
  4. Pulling your wallet for her for everything. Actually, there’s nothing too bad about it, especially if you’re just being gentlemanly and traditional. However, it can be a little demeaning if you do it the wrong way and you do it a little too much. There’s a good way of offering to pay for stuff, and there is the insulting way – like when you pull out your cash and count it in front of her like some TV villain.
  5. Moving your eyebrows up and down a la Johnny Bravo. This is okay if you’re joking around your friends or your girlfriend, or if you’re Johnny Bravo. But to a stranger, to a lady you’re trying to impress, or to your date with the intention of making her think you’re attractive, it will never work.

Well, this is not the right way on how to seduce an attached woman.

Gentlemen, a little bit more courage is well worth it if it means you can stop yourself from doing any of these ego-fatal mistakes. And if you’re guilty of any of these, please – by all means – repent now and change your ways!

How to Win a Funny Girl

People say that the funniest ones are the deepest, most complex types. Their thought processes are practically too fast and too funny that matching them in wits may be a little challenging. What’s even more challenging is to comprehend their emotions because more often than not, they mask their true feelings with a quip or two.

Ask a guy who’s tried winning a funny girl and you’ll know what I mean.

How You Can Win a Funny Girl

Would you know what it means if the lady gestures like this? Find out the answer at SeductionFAQ.com/blog

Funny girls are cut differently from most women. While their funny bones make it quite easy to ‘connect’ with them and talk to them because they seem friendlier, they are not exactly that easily impressed by the same stuff that impresses the “regular-humored” girl.

So how do you win a funny girl? What impresses her and what doesn’t? Here are some tips:

  • Make her laugh. She has been making people laugh so often, but when was the last time someone made an effort to make her laugh? Her love for humor, and natural gift at it, is an indication that she would love someone humorous for company. You may not have her innate gift of humor, but your effort at trying to make her laugh will not go unnoticed. If you can share a laughter or two, if you can exchange jokes, and if you can actually make her laugh (laugh ‘til her belly aches, ‘til tears streak off her cheeks kind of laugh), then you’ve likely impressed her.
  • Be witty. There is a saying about he who laughs last being the slowest thinker. You don’t want to be that person in front of the funny girl. You certainly don’t want her to think that you don’t find her funny, or that you’re too dumb to get her jokes. Wit is something that’s developed overtime and to understand her kind of wit, spend more time with her, her interests, and supplement your brain with useful stuff (aka read and watch significant things).
  • Understand when she’s serious. This is the hardest part, perhaps, about dealing with and trying to impress a funny girl. They make so much jokes that you can hardly tell when they’re being serious and when they’re not. It would be to your advantage if you are sensitive enough when there is an underlying serious message to whatever funny thing she says. She will appreciate your sensitivity and your concern.
  • Embrace her other side. There’s more to this lady than just her quirks and her jokes. She is more than just her bubbly laugh-out-loud personality. There is a complex multi-faceted woman inside her that is looking for that one person who would be willing to discover it, embrace it, and enjoy it no matter how different it is from her funny side. Be that person.
  • Appreciate and compliment other things about her. Everyone calls her funny that it must be old news for her. Look into her different credentials, notice her for her smarts, appreciate and compliment her for them. Be that person who took the time to not only notice but appreciate and pay her a compliment for something else other than her obvious gift of wit.

Do this and you’ll Stick into her mind like a leech!

5 Types of Women You Should Never EVER Date

We’ve all heard stories about horrible dates, dates gone wrong, and dates that should never have happened in the first place. And more often than not (as is the perspective of men), these rather forgettable dates come from one common denominator: the wrong woman to go out with.

Types of women you should avoid.

Types of women you should avoid.

What kind of women you should avoid

To avoid the most horrible dating experience, it’s only perfectly logical to avoid the woman who could bring it about. Muscle up and say no to these kinds of women – the ones that you should never, ever date from our Pickup Artists Database:

1. THE PSYCHO. This is by far the worst that you could go. This is the lady who seems normal in the beginning but goes all out insane when things don’t go her way. She will walk all over you, get jealous of everyone, stalk you, and throw a tantrum over the smallest reason.
Why you should avoid her: her insanity will drive you crazy!
Telltale signs: Psychotic dates normally start out as the sweet, genuinely nice type. But be careful when she begins to show some feistiness – her idea of sexy is biting, controlling, and letting you do all that she bids. Oh and she’s also the type who gets upset over the smallest things.

2. THE PRINCESS. She’d take you shopping – no, she won’t buy for you but she’d love your company to carry all of her shopping bags. Just like the psycho, she’d walk all over you and boss you around. She may throw a tantrum or two, but she does not stalk or get jealous of everyone. She’d want you to take her to the most expensive places and expect you to pay for it. Show up in a cab and your date is auto-cancelled! PS: She’s also mostly self-centered. See this article.

Why you should avoid her: One obvious, don’t-need-no-convincing reason to actually avoid the Princess is the fact that’s she’s going to get you broke. Her high maintenance lifestyle can be too much and you’d end up empty and feeling sorry for yourself and your bank account!
Telltale signs: She owns all the most expensive stuff, she knows all the brands and she hangs out with equally financially endowed people.

3. THE HARDCORE FEMINISTS. You hardly have any chance winning her heart and she’d kill your attempt at chivalry. She sees you as competition and she’ll do anything to win against you. She belittles most men, including you, and thinks that she’s better than you.

Why you should avoid her: Respect is hard to earn from someone who has closed her mind on all men. All your efforts on her might prove futile; plus, she might never ever see you as an equal but always as a competition. And in a relationship with her, you might never get to wear the pants.
Telltale signs: Hardcore feminists are characterized by their bossy, alpha female attitude. They’d never take any kind of crap from anyone especially men and they are in control. They know what they want and they know how to get it. They are very competitive against men too.

4. EVERYBODY’S EX-GIRLFRIEND. You might not easily appreciate going out with the girl who’s been everyone else’s girlfriend. Sure it would merit a proud guy moment to be dating a popular girl but would it really be worth it if you’re dating a girl who has an ex at every block?

Why you should avoid her: Don’t you think it’s a little fishy that her relationships never lasted? This professional ex-girlfriend might have something that all her exes have seen that you don’t want to deal with.
Telltale signs: they’re rather obvious. Everyone knows her as someone’s ex-girlfriend.

5. PARASITE. When it comes to relationships, money is always a touchy issue. This is especially true if you’re dating someone who loves your money more than you. She wants access to your ATM, she makes you buy all her luxuries, and she does not even show a little remorse for making you pay for her own phone bill.

Why you should avoid her: Yes, sweetheart, she’s only after your money. And there’s nothing good at all about that fact.
Telltale signs: before you even go out, if the lady looks like she’s living a lifestyle that her job can’t afford, run away. This can only mean she’s too ambitious beyond her capacity and she’s not looking into working for her dreams anytime soon! Now know the types of men that women will never date.

Some Blog Updates…

If you’re wondering where I’ve been away, OK, so I’ve taken a short sabbatical since my last blog post. I was at Avenged Sevenfold’s launch party for Hail To The King (Billboard #1, haters) where I met with a couple of really cool goth chicks. Will blog about this soon enough…

I am now back at full swing at this blogging thing. I am not too technically inclined so bear with me – I am having problems with WordPress. If you are good with this technically, please get in touch.

Meanwhile, get out there and meet more women – it’s better than reading any blog. :)

Love,

Sebastian (emailing from Nova Scotia over the weekend)

PS: Stumbled upon this article on dating mistakes on Men’s Health – read it, and we will discuss it in my next blog post next week. Also, while you are at it, go visit my friend Matt Ganz’ blog at SIBG.com – check him out if you’re planning to go to Baltimore for some action.

How to Deal with an Unsweet Girlfriend

Girls are not made of the same sugar-coating. Some of us have had more than others; some girls are more spicy than sweet and others are just plain cold. And if you’re dating one of these cold ones, do not consider yourself fully unlucky.

Sure they do not hold your hands in public, nor even get all googly-eyed when you say their names. They may never have given you a single card throughout your relationship, and they may never have called you by any name other than your given. But according to SIBG’s guide to love, in some ways you are luckier. For one, these girls have less drama.

But if their unsweetness is getting to your nerves and bothering you, and may have been stirring some doubts in your brain as to whether they truly love you or not, and you’re already starting to feel jealous of her dog for getting more sweetness from her than you’d ever had since you first dated, then this one’s for you.

Gentlemen, here are some tips on how to deal with an unsweet, unromantic, almost cold girlfriend:

  • Understand where she’s coming from.

Like I said, we girls aren’t cut from the same tree. She must have been raised by parents who taught her that being sweet is being weak. Or her parents must have been exactly the same. Or something must have discouraged her from showing any real sign of being romantic. It could be anything really; and if it so bothers you, then delve deeper into why she’s like that. You will either appreciate her for who she currently is, or you will know exactly how to tap into her sweet subconscious.

  • Teach by example.

The golden rule says treat others the way you want them to treat you. This is very helpful in this situation. Your own actions might have discouraged her from being sweet, and your own aversion to sweetness might have scared her sweetness away. Show her how you want her to treat you – treat her with the same sweetness that you want from her. She’ll get the hint – trust me.

  • Tell her about it.

Why beat around the bush? An open communication is one of the best ways to let your girl that you’re happy in a relationship and are doing okay. Relationships are supposed to be comfortable enough for the couple to be able to open up to the other person. So nicely, gently, and maybe in a coaxing sweet manner you can ask why she seems a little put off by sweetness. Don’t be accusing or confrontational – that will make all your efforts at making her sweet towards you totally useless. In any kind of couple talk, honesty, confidence and trust are the key factors to make it work.

  • Be appreciative of her efforts at being sweet.

So she’s sweet once in twenty moons. Appreciate it. Let her know by validating it. This is one of the ways to avoid constant miscommunication in relationships. Her littlest actions towards being sweet can only continue if it gets positive reinforcement from you – the recipient of the action. If she sees that her sweet actions make you happy, she’ll likely continue doing it.

  • Appreciate her for who she is.

Maybe she just does not have the DNA for sweetness. That does not make her a totally horrible person, does it? I believe you fell in love for her despite that lack of sweetness that you’re talking about – appreciate it, nurture it, be grateful for it.